Monday, July 25, 2005, 7:05 PM
what can i say? i m already speechless. im totally lost for words. theres nothin else that i can say. period.
i thot that things would get back to normal. i never knew there was such a side. i never knew. i always thought that, things were on their way back. how was i to noe. but even if it had to become this ugly, u need not do that. i ll rather u tell me straight in the face. i dun wan to b the last to know lyk the other person. i always knew that u wew lyk dat. but i never knew that u cld go against me lyk dat. i never ever thought that i would b next on your list. i lost my faith. i know that that there wld no longer b hope.
the other, some1 [wait, not sum1,few] warned me about u b4, i always gv u the benifit of the doubt, but u had to break that trust. together.
izzit me or izzit others? i really hope that it is others, but the fact points it straight at me. the fact that i always make people pissed. that i have an attitute problem. the fact that i have a character that others cannot stand [neither do they want to sit..] this is no laughin matter. mayb its them, mayb its me. even though i know its me, i still ask that qns for juz that spark of hope, but...if it is me, what does the world want of me? what can/ those people expect of me?
people always said that one should never listen/bother to/about others comments, but is that really possible? should i heck care bout what the others say, and live my life, or should i change n please the world? but would that still be me?[ k, ppl hu read this line wld say i m gvin excuses] should i be bothered? but can i not care about it? u know what? i feel that i rather not know..bu zhi ze wei wu gu zhe. i ll stop here. but wait... ...
But by the Grace of God, i am what i am, and his Grace was not without effect
Friday, July 22, 2005, 9:17 PM
i dun mean to purposely type in chi not to let others know what i am typing, but its is just that there are some things that can be more beautifully said in chinese. i just want to say that, i HAVE been reflecting on what a person i am. things that has happened in this past week has really affected me, so i hv been really bitchy, really mean, a backstabber??[depends on what others think//i aint sure...] v v v short tempered.i am really really sorry if i hurt anyone in the past or through this period.mayb ur impression of me has went from bad to worse.but its just that things are really moving really fast. i nd to stop and think, reflect, straighten out my thoughts. think about the past, the present and what i shoud do in the future. what i should change, what i can do and what i should not do. i promise, after this week, i WANT to change, its just a matter of time and how i do it. i gv my word, i ll change, for better for worse... ...
Tuesday, July 19, 2005, 11:45 PM
有人说要说有意义的话。本姑娘就试试看吧! 人 生里有很多很多的无奈，我们做人的就只能忍受，无能为力的承受。所以，学会能忍受是一种学问，一种人生经验。可是，对我来说这个学问我学不起，我也学不 会。无论我多努力，多用心的去学，我一直学不会。我真的想学会忍。但，我就是不行！！！就像刚刚那样，我忍不住大喊大闹。我很久没这么做了，但一时忍不住 害到我失常。我最近也应忍不住儿常常为了一点不应该吃醋的事儿喝了几桶醋。虽然说醋对身体好，但像我喝这么多，不出毛病才怪呢！哎，这样下去还得了！放心 吧，虽然我一直都还没成功，但失败乃成功之母，我会据徐努力，不会让你失望的！
Wednesday, July 13, 2005, 10:00 PM
yala ya la..i shall blog bout derrick. hes a virgo!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh man..one of the few guys who is vrigo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol..den wad else arh? ngee ann poly, 17/8 born. blood type A+ den dunoe le..oh yar.. 165.5cm n 50kg..lol dats all..lol..happy now xian? lol..derrick nice la..but yan hao more shuai!!!!!!! lol..tadae went out ta ps.. bought pressie le.. so no nd fret le.. heex..den tadae take 2 neo booth. aiya..dun wan tok le la..wade..pissed. bye.
Friday, July 01, 2005, 10:04 PM
tmr is sat le..dunoe y still weird weird de..lyk got dun hv dat happy feelin that i was hoping it wld come...then think bac n really felt tt i was a total bitch the whole past wk..hiaz..first wk of sch n i lyk dat liao..wad bout the rest of the year?!? i dun wan ta be the person i was in the 1st wk..hiaz..sry ta those ppl hu had ta da han me la..lyk yx, vona, mummy,kinta..yadda yadda..sry fer the person i was being la...i juz..i oso dune la..tmr moz prob goin out with aunt..heex..hope can buy the nwo shirt i wan..den that SUPER EX skirt dat me n yx saw..$45!!!..but v v v nice..n its DISNEY!!! heex..n i wan a hp plan...lol..that i moz prob canot get la..lol..but nevertheless..its worth a try...heex..k kz..mayb the happy mood is back to stay..i hope..
wo yao bian cheng yi qian de ji zi..wo hui bian cheng yi qian de ji zi..ni fang xing..wo bu hui luan..wo yao ren ding..gei wo yi dian dian de shi jian jiu hao..heng kuai heng kuai de..qi sji..xing li yi you da an le..zhi yao wo qu mian dui jiu ke yi le..hai you wo de hao nu you..wo ye bu xian zai hu..zhi yao you ni jiu hao..ni jian wan jian wan bie ling wo shi wang.....bu ran.....................wo hui beng kui de... ... ...